Self Confidence

I've always had very low self esteem. I don't know if anorexia has anything to do with this or not. I know that being skinny boosts my self esteem, as it does for many others, but Ana doesn't have a part in this. Ana kills is inside, but being thin is what keeps us alive. I know this post is rather back and forth and confusing, but I cannot truly answer of anorexia boostsy self esteem or not. I believe that anorexia tears my self esteem down, but the effects of Ana bring it up. Sorry if this is confusing.